Saturday, September 17, 2005

Groin Injury Saturday: The Anti-Christ

If there is one guy who deserves a groin injury it is the un-maker of all that is good, the Anti-Christ.

According to Adso, a 10th-century Monk, the Anti-Christ will let himself become circumcised as an adult after his education.



Apparently, having this procedure and declaring yourself King is a sign of the end times. According to 'prophecy', after convincing millions of people with his circumcision credentials that he should be the King of All, the Anti-Christ rules with an evil hand for a few years until something happens and he's killed by somebody.

Many people believe that being circumcised as an adult is more painful and dangerous than as a baby. The jury is still out on that as infants almost assuredly feel pain more intensely than an adult. But the adult patient can have complications that an infant will not. Much of the idea that the procedure is worse for an adult probably comes from the trepidation of "going under the knife" and multi-generation wives-tales.

2000 years ago there probably was a greater danger to the adult, as hygiene and medical knowledge was lacking compared to today. At least Baby Jesus had the advantage of being able to lay hands on himself and do a little healing.

"Listen, you! It's my penis, I'll heal it as much and as for long as I want!"
The AC was likely nothing short of pestilence personified so he probably caught all kinds of infections that rendered his gear useless.

So this week's installment is another self-inflicted groin injury that looks like less a medical procedure steeped in ritual and more of a calculated career move.

Now if you say to yourself 'this entry shouldn't be here...the Anti-Christ isn't a comic book character', then you haven't been paying attention all those years.

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